Recently, I’ve been pushing myself to reach out, and meet new people, a little more than I have in a few years
I’ve met some exceptional people along the way.
People who were crazy.
People that weren’t so beautiful.
Some sophisticated ones.
Some individuals who had no confidence in themselves.
Others who had more confidence in areas that made no sense to me.
Ones that were broken.
And some that were going through redemption/healing.
Throughout this process, I have found one thing to be certain. One thing that no matter their circumstances, always laid to be true.
Every person in this short time, has stated in some form, that they desired to be loved; to be worth something, to someone. Maybe they didn’t say those words exactly, but the conversation always took the course in discussing our shortcomings that other people had pointed out, and how we could overcome those shortcomings. How we could dominate them, in order to find acceptance in the eyes of our peers.
Over the twenty-nine years of my life, I have spent at least twenty-six of those years determining who I was by other people’s opinions. I would obsess over their words; allowing them to tear me down. I would obsess over their looks that said I was different, over their judgments and assumptions of my mistakes. I let the words, looks, judgments of others tell me who I was, and how meaningful of a life I lived.
Then I discovered a resounding truth.
It was all a lie.
All of it.
Every word that they had spoken.
Every look that they had glance.
Every judgment that they had passed.
ALL. A. LIE.
None of their opinions matters. Their words carry no weight. Their looks mean nothing about me, but lots about them. Their judgments and assumptions of my mistakes,, again, only spoke to their sin, not of mine. None of how any of those people along the way responded truly meant anything.
What matters is God. His opinion. My worth in Him. He tells me daily that I am worth death. I am worth the sacrifice of His son, in order for me to experience His love and his complete and never ending grace.
Without God, I am nothing.
Without people, I am something.
Without God’s approval, I fall short.
Without people’s approval, I am still something.
Without God’s love, I am not redeemed.
Without people’s love, I am still redeemed.
Maybe you are someone who has been struggling with your worth. Maybe daily, you analyze and classify your life; your accomplishments and failures. Only to decide that you have fallen short. You are not good enough; for yourself or to anyone else.
It’s a lie.
You are enough. You have fallen short, sure. But you are still enough. God loves you in a way that nobody else can. This love does not find your mistakes to be too much to bare. This love finds your mistakes as a reason to give you hope; to give you courage, and fight, and resolve. This love is something that changes us so that we will never be the same. Ever. It completes us in a way that we no longer have to show or prove our worth. Our worth is proven in our love, in our actions of grace, mercy, gentleness, kindness.
It sucks to care so much about what others think and say about us. It’s nearly impossible to overcome.
Here’s the best part.
We don’t have to overcome.
Because He has.
So…live. Live fully knowing that you ARE worth something. You ARE desired. You ARE loved.
Nobody needs to tell you this, or confirm this in you.
Because it already has…and it still IS.